Friday, March 1, 2013

How can I make this intro Paragraph Sound Better??!?

How can I make this intro Paragraph Sound Better??!?
The military draft has contributed a lot to the United State of America during the World War 2. During the World War 2, the congress has invented a technique which was call the military draft which was a technique that allowed adults between the age of 18-24 to go to the military to help their country when needed. Even though they were force to serve their country, it was a benefit for the soldiers too. It helped them to earn lots money and becoming more mature in life. The military draft had helped those soldiers to learn something handy that would help them later in life and it would help those people to learn some respect for those solider who served and fought the country. If we bring back the military draft it would be a benefit for the country and a benefit for the soldiers and then we can finally put a stop to Iraq.
Homework Help - 3 Answers
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1 :
don't say the world war 2: just say world war 2!
2 :
The Military Draft has contributed a lot to the USA during World War II. The Congress had made a Rule , called the Military Draft , making it compulsory for all men between the ages 18-24 to join the military and fight for the country , when called to do so.This may have seemed like the men were forced to serve their country - but they did benefit by earning some money and becoming mature.It taught them skills which they found , later on, useful in life. They were able to view the military in a different perspective and learn to value and respect the soilders who served the country.Maybe , if the Military Draft is brough back , we will be able to benefit from it , help the country and hopefully put an end to the Iraq trouble.
3 :
Here it is corrected: The military draft contributed a lot to the United States of America during World War 2. During World War 2, Congress invented the military draft, a technique that allowed adults between the ages of 18-24 to help their country when needed. Even though they were forced to serve their country, it was a benefit for the soldiers as well. It helped them to earn money and become more mature. The military draft helped the soldiers learn something handy that would help them later in life, and it would help people to learn respect for soliders who served and fought for the country. If we bring back the military draft, it would be a benefit for the country and a benefit for the soldiers. Then we can finally put a stop to the conflict in Iraq.